Senior Chand Amerasinghe (better known as \u201cChand America\u201d) came to school four hours late last Wednesday despite promises to raise his 0.2 Grade-Point Average. He arrived at school around 12:15 pm, attending most of lunch before leaving for the day. He apologized profusely and claimed his alarm didn\u2019t go off, but his parents and teachers remain unhappy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI just don\u2019t understand,\u201d father Felix Amerasinghe said. \u201cHe only has three classes, and two of them are internships. How could anybody even sleep for 14 hours?\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Chand explained to us in an email that he was exhausted from making a sports parlay which required extensive research. The parlay is six-legged and he does not believe the Yankees will win, he said. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Melissa Carr, Chand\u2019s English teacher, expressed concerns that he isn\u2019t applying himself in class. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHe came to my class late yesterday and all he did was talk loudly with his friends about his six-legged parlay for thirty minutes. Chand has a 19% in my class right now, and that stupid parlay isn\u2019t even gonna hit. Everyone knows the White Sox will lose,\u201d Carr said. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The tardy arrival came at an unfortunate time for Chand America, especially with his current GPA. He claims that he set four alarms and none of them went off. Apple CEO Tim Cook said in a brief response that this is \u201cmathematically impossible.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Lavanya Sithanandam, Chand\u2019s mother, alleged that she tried to wake him up three times but he remained unresponsive. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI pulled the sheets off his bed, flicked the light switch on and off, and even threw a slipper at him. I tried everything. It\u2019s just the same old story, and I totally heard his alarm going off,\u201d she said. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Chand \u2014 who forgot that he had an interview with us last Friday \u2014 was unable to issue a detailed response to the allegations. Whitman\u2019s Captain America promised to attend on Tuesday so he can play in the baseball team\u2019s state semi-final at Shirley Povich Field, on May 21st at 7 pm. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cIf Chand goes yard on Tuesday and the boys in blue win, f\u2014 it, I\u2019ll give him an A in the class,\u201d said Chand\u2019s internship teacher. Show up on Tuesday to watch Chand battle for a state championship and his high school diploma. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Senior Chand Amerasinghe (better known as \u201cChand America\u201d) came to school four hours late last Wednesday despite promises to raise his 0.2 Grade-Point Average. He arrived at school around 12:15 pm, attending most of lunch before leaving for the day. He apologized profusely and claimed his alarm didn\u2019t go off, but his parents and teachers […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":30,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-29","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=29"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":31,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29\/revisions\/31"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/30"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=29"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=29"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/therutabaga.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=29"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}