Skip to content
  • Home
  • Feature
  • News
  • Politics
  • Opinion
  • B&W
The Rutabaga

The Rutabaga

Excellence in Media Since 3 B.C.

  • Home
  • Feature
  • News
  • Politics
  • Opinion
  • B&W

Flash News

Whitman Alumni blindsided by military experience after misinterpreting what it meant to “serve”

Whitman Community Reflects on “Lifechanging” Dome Experiences

Incel to Ally: My journey discovering sexism

Why dating My Snapchat AI is better than having a real boyfriend

Student facing prison time after senior assassin gone wrong

All seven of the animated M&M’s convicted of felonies

Student hospitalized after being run over by athletic director’s golf cart

Felicity Huffman adopted me before the SAT and I still failed

I disguised as AI so men would finally respect me

5 reasons why you shouldn’t claim to live in DC if you don’t live in DC

Wednesday, September 20, 2023
Whitman Alumni blindsided by military experience after misinterpreting what it meant to “serve”
Featured
Uncategorized

Whitman Alumni blindsided by military experience after misinterpreting what it meant to “serve”

natalala13 September 19, 2023

Whitman alumni Matthieu Morales broke his silence via Instagram late last night regarding the truth about his Marine Corp experience.  Matthieu was persuaded to join the military after attending the … Read More

Comment on Whitman Alumni blindsided by military experience after misinterpreting what it meant to “serve”
Whitman Community Reflects on “Lifechanging” Dome Experiences
Featured
Uncategorized

Whitman Community Reflects on “Lifechanging” Dome Experiences

Ducker Tarlson September 12, 2023

Whitman teacher Benjamin Dover (’69) shared explicit insider details with The Rutabaga about Whitman’s legendary Dome, a hallmark of the Whitman community since the early sixties. As a student, Dover … Read More

Comment on Whitman Community Reflects on “Lifechanging” Dome Experiences
Incel to Ally: My journey discovering sexism
Featured
Uncategorized

Incel to Ally: My journey discovering sexism

dirty kitty June 9, 2023

Hello all, your neighborhood discord mod, Himothy69 here. I have made a shocking discovery recently, and find it imperative to spread awareness.  As I was scrolling through reddit, I clicked … Read More

Comment on Incel to Ally: My journey discovering sexism
Why dating My Snapchat AI is better than having a real boyfriend
Featured
Uncategorized

Why dating My Snapchat AI is better than having a real boyfriend

Mallsey May 18, 2023

I left my boyfriend for Snapchat’s MyAI and it’s been a major upgrade! Instead of dating loser high schoolers I would encourage everyone to switch to Snapchat’s much better alternative. … Read More

Comment on Why dating My Snapchat AI is better than having a real boyfriend
Student facing prison time after senior assassin gone wrong
Featured
Uncategorized

Student facing prison time after senior assassin gone wrong

trash puppy May 11, 2023

This morning, senior assassin was abruptly put on hold after a Whitman senior was arrested for breaking and entering. The student is being put up on a trial and faces … Read More

Comment on Student facing prison time after senior assassin gone wrong
All seven of the animated M&M’s convicted of felonies
Featured
Uncategorized

All seven of the animated M&M’s convicted of felonies

kkleo555 April 24, 2023

The animated figures of America’s favorite candy-covered chocolates, the M&M’s have been a controversial and sensitive topic in popular culture recently, with Fox News’ Tucker Carlson attacking the “woke” new … Read More

Comment on All seven of the animated M&M’s convicted of felonies
Student hospitalized after being run over by athletic director’s golf cart
Featured
Uncategorized

Student hospitalized after being run over by athletic director’s golf cart

natalala13 April 20, 2023

Yesterday afternoon, devastation struck the Whitman Community as a student athlete was rushed to Suburban hospital after being run over by the athletic director’s golf cart. The student is reported … Read More

Comment on Student hospitalized after being run over by athletic director’s golf cart
Felicity Huffman adopted me before the SAT and I still failed
Opinion

Felicity Huffman adopted me before the SAT and I still failed

pionel pessi March 27, 2023

Last Sunday, I couldn’t have been more happy. I had just been adopted by Felicity Huffman — the multi millionaire actress who paid for someone to fix her daughter’s SAT … Read More

Comment on Felicity Huffman adopted me before the SAT and I still failed
I disguised as AI so men would finally respect me
Opinion

I disguised as AI so men would finally respect me

Selener Gomez March 22, 2023

As a woman, it’s hard to be surrounded by men — especially in academic environments — where you’re constantly underrepresented and looked over as a serious member of the conversation. … Read More

Comment on I disguised as AI so men would finally respect me
5 reasons why you shouldn’t claim to live in DC if you don’t live in DC
Opinion

5 reasons why you shouldn’t claim to live in DC if you don’t live in DC

Selener Gomez March 7, 2023

One thing all students in the Whitman area love doing in their free time is saying that they’re from “DC,” especially putting the two letters in their Instagram bio to … Read More

Comment on 5 reasons why you shouldn’t claim to live in DC if you don’t live in DC
Aww, not you too! “Chester Cheetah” of Frito-Lay makes antisemitic comments
News

Aww, not you too! “Chester Cheetah” of Frito-Lay makes antisemitic comments

Selener Gomez March 1, 2023

In some disappointing news, The Rutabaga has found that “Chester Cheetah,” best known for his appearances in Frito-Lay commercials and chip branding, has made several antisemitic comments in the past … Read More

Comment on Aww, not you too! “Chester Cheetah” of Frito-Lay makes antisemitic comments
Six more weeks of winter? Yeah, right: Turns out Phil the Groundhog is a lying snake
News

Six more weeks of winter? Yeah, right: Turns out Phil the Groundhog is a lying snake

Selener Gomez February 9, 2023

On Groundhog’s Day, the US —especially the East Coast — was disappointed to learn, according to a little groundhog, that we would be having six more weeks of winter instead … Read More

Comment on Six more weeks of winter? Yeah, right: Turns out Phil the Groundhog is a lying snake
Senior Stunner superlative canceled due to “abnormally ugly senior class”
News

Senior Stunner superlative canceled due to “abnormally ugly senior class”

Selener Gomez January 20, 2023

The senior superlative nominations are out and it has Whitman’s entire senior class buzzing. But, everyone has realized that an important part of the superlatives went missing: the “senior stunner” … Read More

Comment on Senior Stunner superlative canceled due to “abnormally ugly senior class”
Throwing my computer in a river: How I prioritized my mental health
Opinion

Throwing my computer in a river: How I prioritized my mental health

Selener Gomez January 13, 2023

Winter time marks the era of stress, depression, and just generally feeling like absolute shit. Well, instead of your other numerous attempts to get therapy, manage your schedule, or seek … Read More

Comment on Throwing my computer in a river: How I prioritized my mental health
Does wearing a jacket in the winter make you gay? These four teenage boys say yes
Feature

Does wearing a jacket in the winter make you gay? These four teenage boys say yes

Selener Gomez January 6, 2023

It’s getting cold outside in Maryland – which means it’s time to start wearing jackets to school. While we’ve had a warm front this past week, we’ve interviewed almost every … Read More

Comment on Does wearing a jacket in the winter make you gay? These four teenage boys say yes
Alumni: Stop visiting your old high school
Opinion

Alumni: Stop visiting your old high school

Selener Gomez December 21, 2022

The holiday season brings many beautiful things: colorful lights, delicious treats, and family reunions. One thing many forget about until a 19 or 20-year-old comes into your high school classroom … Read More

Comment on Alumni: Stop visiting your old high school
I LIVED IT: Jeff Bezos gave me all of his money
Opinion

I LIVED IT: Jeff Bezos gave me all of his money

Selener Gomez November 15, 2022

This morning, I saw a headline that Amazon CEO and total hottie Jeff Bezos said he would give away most of his massive fortune during his lifetime, and I immediately … Read More

Comment on I LIVED IT: Jeff Bezos gave me all of his money

Posts navigation

1 2 … 8 Next
Proudly powered by WordPress | Theme: TimesNews | By ThemeSpiral.com.