Halloween is approaching in only a few days, and you can feel the buzz in the halls of Whitman. October…
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Breaking: MCPS Board of Education requests Wootton to change name of school to Lootton because they ‘take too many Ls’
In the wake of Whitman wins again Wootton in both the girl’s varsity soccer regional championship and the handball county…
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ESPN Frustrated after NFL draft pick has no dead family members
Clemson Junior Trevor Lawrence has been touted as a generational talent at the Quarterback position. Highly respected NFL scout Anita…
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Despite his claims of being Pro-life, Rush Limbaugh has died
Rush Limbaugh, the conservative media mogul most famous for his work on Family Guy, has died of lung cancer at…
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Bernie Sanders Sells Used Mittens to Jeff Bezos for $45 billion
January 20, 2021 will go down as one of the most important days in American history. An event so historic,…
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Bye Bye, Boris: Boris Johnson quits job as PM, now selling porridge to homeless people on the streets of London
This week, our London reporters have come across a troubling report. U.K. Prime Minister Boris Johnson, the 2020 world’s sexiest…
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Guys who wear shorts to school in December are outraged about online school
The pandemic has affected all of us in some way or another. Some people lost their jobs, others have lost…
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Breaking: Democratic party membership decreases 78% after news releases that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has a boyfriend
After news released that New York Democratic senator Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is dating a man by the name of Riley Roberts,…
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Founder of MoCo Snow has evil plans to create snow days
The Rutabaga gained access to a classified document on October 30 containing MoCoSnow creator Alex Tsironis’ plan to make fake…
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Sources: Pres. Trump to fire Giuliani, hire Borat as personal counsel
After exposing the latest Rudy Giuliani scandal, Borat certainly made a name for himself. Clearly, he made a big splash,…
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